"I really just think of you as a little brother," she said as the words echoed loudly through my head.

"I was just kidding," I responded, but secretly that statement was the farthest thing from the truth. I had been secretly plotting my strategy to make her mine for the better part of two years of high school. I had sat and watched as her never-ending parade of boyfriends transverse through her life like a revolving door.

Each and every time I was her rock, her shoulder to cry on. I was there on the phone with here at three in the morning as she wept tears of sorrow, I was there carrying her home after a sloppy night of drinking at the bar and now here I was, the only man in her life who would never do anything to hurt her and I was being told in laments terms that I wasn't worthy of her affection.

It had taken me almost two years to muster up the courage to tell her how I felt. And now here I was heart broken and depressed. Two years of my life were down the drain with nothing to show for it.

My immediate emotion was anger, followed by resentment coupled with sorrow. I felt socially awkward and insecure and the worst part of it all was I had no idea what I was doing wrong.

There are hundreds of thousands of men the world over who suffer from the exact same problem. Hopeless romantics who believe that honesty and sincerity will see them through to the end of the day and that chivalry still has a place in the heart of the one that they love.

It's easy to understand why guys think this way. Think about any conversation that you've had with a close female friend of yours. It usually goes something like this, "I wish I could find a really nice guy who was different from all of the assholes that I meet on a regular basis. I wish he was kind and caring and honest and in general just loved me for who I am." That guy she's describing kind of sounds familiar doesn't he? Of course he does, because that guy is you.

Right now you're probably wondering to yourself, if I'm the guy of her dreams than why doesn't she reciprocate the feelings that I have for her. The answer is quite simple, she lied!!!!

That's right she whole-heartedly lied to you and you bought every word of it. Don't worry, it wasn't intentional. The problem is that there is a big disconnect between what women want and what they perceive they want. After all, there is a reason why the slogan goes nice guys finish last, not nice guys finish first.

This doesn't mean she wants an asshole, she simply wants a guy who can stand up for himself, a guy who can protect her and a guy who has social value someone who is active and has more in his life than just her.

The problem with being her best friend is two fold, one she see's you as someone who will always be there for her. That means that regardless of what she does to you, you'll be there to comfort and console her no questions asked. This makes you come across as a wimp and someone without any confidence.

Secondly although you've established trust and comfort in the relationship that you've built with her, it is devoid of any sexual tension. She views your relationship as strictly plutonic and nothing else.

The fact of the matter is, the longer your friendship with her lasts, the more she will see you in this light. It's what we like to refer to as BFFed. (Best Friend Forevered)

Converting your friend into a girlfriend is labor intensive, it's going to require a lot of work and a lot of planning but before you make the commitment and the sacrifice you need to consider a few things.

Is my friendship worth risking? I was able to maintain a solid friendship with my friend, but you might not be so lucky. You need to seriously think about the consequences of your decision. If things don't go according to plan there is the chance that your friendship will be permanently strained or even worse vanquished.

You also need to think about how your decision affects the rest of your friends. Chances are this girl isn't just your friend, but friends with your other buddies as well. Think about the group dynamics before proceeding.

If you're serious about making this work then I encourage you to go for it. Nothing is worse than looking back on life and regretting not taking up an opportunity that had presented itself.

If you want to win over your friend, the first step is to forget about them. That's right you need to forget about the lust you have for friend. As long as you're a love struck puppy you'll never have a shot at turning your friendship into romance.

What you need to do is start meeting other women, stop spending all of your free time with your friend and go out and meet other attractive women, make these girls your friends or better yet date them. This shows your friend that women value you and there's more to you than she had previously perceived.

Next you need to constantly show this newfound skill to your friend. Invite her out with you to a bar or club and then excuse yourself to go hit on a cute blonde sitting one table over. This will almost certainly drive her crazy with jealousy. The always-available rock of a friend isn't so available any more.

Lastly incorporate some playful flirting and Kino into your friendship. You should find now that her acceptance of you as a romantic partner has increased tenfold. She will be much more open to your sexual advances and more willing to engage in a sexual relationship with you.

The key is to stop pursuing her and get her to pursue you. Now you are the target, the one who is desired and cannot be obtained.

On New Years of this year I was out a club with a group of buddies when I happened to run in to my friend that I had a crush on so many years ago. She knows what I do for a living and she hears stories of my adventures with women. She looks at me differently now, playfully hugging and touching me whenever she can.

On this night she greeted me with a huge hug and playfully bit my neck. We had a few drinks before she pulled me into a quiet corner in the back of the club.

"How come you never call me anymore," she said in a half whine. "I really love you you know, I'm better than any of the girls that you pick up. What do they have over me?"

I grinned and I laughed, if this was eight years ago I would have jumped at the opportunity to take her up on her offer. But that ship has sailed, I'm no longer attracted to her and have more than my share of 9's and 10's to choose from. It's not a knock on my friend, she's a great person and very beautiful, but there's just a certain empowerment you feel when you achieve the unattainable, more often than not you don't want it anymore.

You may find that after going out and meeting other girls your friend no longer interests you. That's fine it happens, we're men and sometimes our sights are blinded by the most attractive girl in their line of vision. Keep this in mind and give other girls a chance you never know, you just might find that what you want and what you perceive you want are two very different things.