Women say they
want a nice guy, yet usually end up dating bad boys. Here’s why:
Not real: Nice guys are too
nice. No one can always be that nice unless
they’re a saint. They are busy being nice instead of being real and women
instinctually don’t trust that. Bad boys
“keep it real”. Nice guys don’t want to
upset the apple cart.
Respect: No one respects a
doormat. Nice guys don’t set boundaries or
make any real demands. A bad boy doesn’t
let a woman walk all over him or control him.
Women can’t respect a man they can control. No respect = No attraction.
Predictable: Most people lead
boring, predictable lives, so they’re attracted to people who are exciting and
unpredictable. Bad boys are always a
challenge. Nice guys are never a challenge.
Predictable = No excitement = No challenge = I prefer a bad boy.
Mother Nature: Women are
designed to nurture. However, instead of
doing this with children, they often end up doing it with bad boys. They think their love will save them. Nice guys rarely need to be saved.
Fixer-Upper: Nice guys don’t
usually need to be fixed. Bad boys usually do, so they become a project. Women think if they can “create” the perfect
man, he will never leave them. Also, if
they’re busy fixing someone else, they don’t have to look at what needs to be
fixed in their own lives.
Sperm wars: Women are
designed to procreate with the strongest possible genes. Bad boys are
sending an unconscious message that they have great genes, so they’re not
afraid of losing the woman by misbehaving.
Nice guys are sending a message that they don’t think their genes are
good enough, so they won’t misbehave.
Fear of intimacy: If a woman
is afraid of intimacy, she subconsciously knows she can avoid it with a bad
boy, since she can never get close enough to him to have to go there. A nice guy will eventually want a commitment,
and that’s scary.
Low self-esteem: We don’t
feel comfortable with people who treat us better than we treat ourselves. If you don’t think much of yourself, the bad
boy is simply reinforcing your negative belief.
A nice guy is treating you in a way you’re unfamiliar with.
Sex: Women feel a nice guy
won’t be good in bed. They like to be
manhandled sometimes and think a nice guy won’t be able to take control and get
the job done. A bad boy comes across as being
able to get the job done, even though that may not always be the case.
Hot: Have you ever seen a
bad boy who wasn’t hot? I’m sure there
are a few, but they wouldn’t be able to get away with half the stuff they did
if they didn’t look so good. Meanwhile,
when a woman describes someone as a nice guy, she means, “He’s not hot”.
Charm: Nice guys don’t
always know what to say, and are sometimes at a loss for words. Bad boys can be very charming and know
exactly what women want to hear. However, they eventually switch over to being
selfish. By the time they reveal their
true colors, the woman has fallen for them and has a hard time letting go.
Protection: Historically,
men have protected women – physically and otherwise. Bad boys give the illusion of being able to
protect women, while with nice guys, women aren’t so sure.
Life is about balance. Most men fall into either the bad boy or the
nice guy category. The ideal man is neither,
but walks that fine line between the two.
Until men learn how to do this, more often than not, women will choose
the bad boy, until they realize that his bad qualities outweigh his good ones.
